You can hear me...but are you listening?

How often do you really listen to what someone else has to say? When you ask, "how are you?" Do you wait to hear the answer? When you are introduced to someone, do you listen to their name? Are you always multi-tasking and partially listening?
Lately I have been trying to really listen to people. And I've realized that it is difficult. It takes a lot of focus and energy. It started with an experience a few weeks back when I met someone new. We spent a long time not saying anything but just looking into each other's eyes. Then slowly we started talking more and more about anything - life, family, friends. The connection I feel when I am with him is incredible because when he speaks I am completely focused on him and lost in his eyes.
Coincidence or not a few days later the book I am reading, The Road Less Traveled, had an entire passage on true listening and setting aside your own stereotypes, desires and expectations so that you can truly understand what the other person is saying as if you were experiencing it.
Then I was at a conference this weekend and there was a session on active listening that had us pair up and star into our partners eyes for 3 minutes while remaining expressionless. It was one of the most difficult things I have ever done. Just looking into the eyes of a stranger. I felt so vulnerable--without saying anything I felt like he learned so much about me. It was a powerful experience.
The experience of truly listening to someone else-- the connection that exists is incredible... Conversations are so powerful. If you see me starring deeply into your eyes sometime soon don't get alarmed... Truly listening to someone else just shows how deeply you care.

Simple yet Profound.

Over Christmas while browsing in a bookstore I ran across a copy of The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho and although I have read it twice before it seemed to be calling me...if a book has ever found you at the right time in your life you know what I mean.
Two words: Remarkable. Refreshing. While reading I found myself thinking about how I live my life. I started dog-earing pages of simple yet profound passages. I found over 40 in all that I went back and really thought about but I'll share just a few now...

Food for thought.

"'It's the simple things in life that are the most extraordinary; only wise men are able to understand them.'" A sunset, a sunrise, the sound of birds chirping, the smell of fresh cut grass, big snowflakes you can catch on your tongue (Jen), the sound of waves rolling against the shore, rain, the crackle of a fire or the rustle of leaves. Yesterday on my walk to the subway I saw these two grey squirrels chasing each other in a tree. They were so adorable. How often do we really enjoy the simple things?

"'What's the world's greatest lie?' the boy asked... 'It's this: that a certain point in our lives, we loose control of what's happening to us, and our lives become controlled by fate. That's the world's greatest lie.'" Sometimes I wonder what the world would be like if each individual around the world saw their potential and felt empowered to take control of their lives. The result could be amazing or it could be a disaster. One of the things I love to do most is to help others uncover the potential they can't see or are forgetting in themselves.

"'Never stop dreaming...When you want something, all the universe conspires to help you achieve it,' the old king had said.'" This is something I truly believe in. I don't believe in coincidences yet sometimes things just seem to fall in place. Recently I was asked what people or events played the greatest role in who I am today. I attribute what I have accomplished to a simple message my parents sent resonating within me. "You can do anything you set your mind to." Once a dreamer always a dreamer but dreaming is only part of it, when you want something just take the initiative to go out and make it happen. If I only accomplish one thing in life it will be to empower my children and children everywhere to go after their dreams.

Simple yet Profound.

All I want for Christmas

Yesterday I was talking with a friend from Canada Devan who is finishing his CEED in Kenya. He asked me, "what do you want more than anything for Christmas?" Without hesitating I answered, "to go snowshoeing with my puppy Maddog and spend the holidays with my grandparents."

What do you want more than anything for Christmas?

I'll be enjoying a White Christmas in Upper Michigan. Happy Holidays Everyone!

Stopping a moment to take a mental snapshot...

One of the most amazing experiences are those unexpected moments where everything around you stops and for 30 seconds or 5 minutes you experience something amazing.

Darko - Madrid...WOW! says:"I was at the Plaza and got between it and the cathedral... there was a small passage or street that was kinda empty...and there was a guy playing saxophone, his case was closed so he wasnt playing for money, it was some kind of blues. It was so powerful and peaceful at the same time...so amazing. And you could see the sunset between the cathedral and the palace....so so so amazing. I wished you were here."

You take a mental snapshot and enjoy the moment. Often you think of a close friend or are reminded of someone special or a past experience. Months later when you think back on the moment you can remember it like it was yesterday. There is something about these moments that are just perfect... they stick with you forever.

When was the last time you stopped in the middle of everything and enjoyed a perfect moment?

You know they hate us...

It went something like this:

M- Why do you always have to do something so different Sarah? You could have the perfect life but you don't want that.
S- Perfect life, what is that supposed to mean?
M- You always have to pick the craziest things, why Colombia adn the Middle East? Why not move to Norway? I have worked my whole life to give you everything and now you are throwing it away.
Middle East>
M- You know they hate us there! They don't want you there!
S- Who hates us Mom? All Muslims? Only Arabs? Who are 'they'?

We ended the conversation because it was going nowhere. After volunteering for AIESEC for 4 years and working full time for 2.5 (not just any organization but one where I dedicate each day to challenging these exact prejudices and building international understanding) I somehow figured my mom would understand why I wanted to do a traineeship in Colombia and the Middle East next year. I guess I was wrong about that. Maybe she doesn't understand who I am and what I stand for... Or maybe deep down she does but is afraid too. I'll chalk this one up as another challenge. We can make an AIESECer out of my mom yet.

Lens of Experience

I find this passage very insightful and reflect on it often in my daily encounters with others.

"Each of us tends to think we see things as they are, that we are objective. But this is not the case. We see the world, not as it is, but as we are--or as we are conditioned to see it. When we open our mouths to describe what we see, we in effect describe ourselves, our perceptions, our paradigms. When other people disagree with us, we immediately think something is wrong with them. But as the demonstration shows, sincere, clearheaded people see things differently, each looking through the unique lens of experience."

- Stephen R. Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, p.28-29

Rwanda 1994: Almost 1 million lives lost

Tonight I watched a move you are probably familiar with - Hotel Rwanda. I am still sitting here in shock unable to believe what I saw on the screen or think of anything else.

It disgusts me that an event so enormous was truly brought to my attention 12 years after the fact. I went to school for 16 years and never once learned about this mass genocide - or similar world events. My own ignorance disgusts me. The thought of how little I know about the world around me and its history scares me.

Paul is a true hero - his courage and leadership was incredible. He refused to be defeated and saved hundreds of lives. The UN commander - did everything possible to defend the refugees and bring them to freedom. And the red cross woman - out in the field rescuing orphans and searching for missing children. These individuals are true heroes who acted with integrity and put the interests of others before their personal welfare. Truly inspirational.

I want to know more about the events that have marked world history and specifically about this genocide in Rwanda and the current situation there. Learning always better late than never.

New British Film on the 1994 Genocide: Shooting Dogs
When will it hit the U.S.?